I bought my wedding dress yesterday. So let me get this out of the way up front. I am not going to post a picture of the wedding dress that I bought. This is because I just don't want to risk Eric seeing it by mistake. I may be an old bride, but I believe there is something fundamentally special about your husband-to-be seeing you in your dress for the first time on your wedding day. Getting married/having a wedding is an experience that I never predicted for my life and I am really going to stick with the traditional (as much as it can be without appearing foolish for a woman my age).
The experience of buying the dress was everything I had hoped it would be. Considering that I never really ever thought about getting married, I didn't have any preconceived wishes for what I wanted my wedding dress to look like. This is probably both a good thing and a bad thing. No expectations, but no good ideas either. I had two girlfriends with me and that was a GOOD thing. They were both supportive and gave me eyes that I didn't have. They also knew when to stop me. Basically at the dress that made me go "Oh my god" as I looked in the mirror. This was my dress. It had no price tag (as was the case with almost all of the dresses that were appealing to my eye), and perhaps there have been too many episodes of "Say Yes To The Dress" in recent weeks, and that terrified me. Say Yes To The Dress Rule #1, never ever try on a dress unless you know you can afford it because without a doubt, that will be the dress you fall in love with and have to mortgage your home to own. But I was pleasantly surprised at the cost of this amazing Casablanca gown. And afford it, I could. And buy it, I did. I thought lovingly of my mom for a moment or two who passed away almost 12 years ago, and knew she would have absolutely loved this dress and being with me for the shopping. I am sorry I missed out on that part of the experience but I don't think I could have asked for a better day or a better result. I know she was looking down at me, and giving her approval.
The rest of the world will just have to wait until June of 2011 to see it.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Nice and Not Nice...
So today I read a headline off of CNN (I think) and it said “Big Banks Try To Make Nice”. I will admit that I didn’t read the article. I am just arrogant and judgmental enough to believe I didn’t need to. I have been in that situation and have had my opinions for many years now.
My philosophy has always been rather simple when it comes to “making nice” or being respectful in general. My phrase of choice to describe my feelings is this: A person who is nice to you, but not nice to the waiter, is not a nice person.
This can be applied to many different areas of concern, banking being one of them. Back in the day when I was a poor hard working minion, I couldn’t afford to bank with a big bank. Weather it was First Union, Wachovia, Bank of America (for whom I even worked for 6 years), or countless others. If you didn’t have $X amount of collateral, assets or worth, they would charge you exorbitant fees to utilize their holier-than-thou services. Services that the upper financial class got for free. As a logical person, this made no sense to me. You are charging the people who are just starting out or having a difficult time financially and who are the ones who obviously cannot afford it, and yet you are giving the services away for free to those who could easily afford to pay for them.
As I got older I began to understand the logic that the banking industry used in choosing the threshold at which they charged for services and that at which they didn’t, I am a business major after all. But understanding it never got me any closer to agreeing with it. To this day I think it is a low-down dirty shame.
My turning point came one day about 15 years ago when I did my banking with First Union. I had about $17 in that account. Money was tighter than my jeans after a Friendly’s ice cream sundae with peanut butter and hot fudge topping. Every month I was charged a fee for not maintaining a minimum balance and every month I hated that they took that fee right out of my account. Well that month the fee was $18 and they took my very last dime. In addition to 10 other dimes that I didn’t have. I had to borrow $20 from my sister and pawn my keyboard to pay for gas to get to work. It was the only time I ever borrowed money from any one in my life. I would have managed to get to my next payday had they not taken that “maintenance” fee.
Several years later and no longer a person who lived paycheck to paycheck, I opened an account with USAA. I opened it with $25. Just as a test, really. It is a huge hassle to change bank accounts and I didn’t want to make a decision I was going to regret later. Well it was the best decision I ever made. This was a bank that worked with me before I got on my financial feet and you better believe I developed a rockin relationship with them after I got there. From one checking account with $25 in it to nine different accounts from Checking and Savings to IRAs (ROTH and Traditional), to both of my houses and so on.
So to the big banks that are now trying to ‘make nice’ I say this: I am reminded of a line uttered by Julia Robert’s character in Pretty Woman: “Big mistake. Huge.”
My philosophy has always been rather simple when it comes to “making nice” or being respectful in general. My phrase of choice to describe my feelings is this: A person who is nice to you, but not nice to the waiter, is not a nice person.
This can be applied to many different areas of concern, banking being one of them. Back in the day when I was a poor hard working minion, I couldn’t afford to bank with a big bank. Weather it was First Union, Wachovia, Bank of America (for whom I even worked for 6 years), or countless others. If you didn’t have $X amount of collateral, assets or worth, they would charge you exorbitant fees to utilize their holier-than-thou services. Services that the upper financial class got for free. As a logical person, this made no sense to me. You are charging the people who are just starting out or having a difficult time financially and who are the ones who obviously cannot afford it, and yet you are giving the services away for free to those who could easily afford to pay for them.
As I got older I began to understand the logic that the banking industry used in choosing the threshold at which they charged for services and that at which they didn’t, I am a business major after all. But understanding it never got me any closer to agreeing with it. To this day I think it is a low-down dirty shame.
My turning point came one day about 15 years ago when I did my banking with First Union. I had about $17 in that account. Money was tighter than my jeans after a Friendly’s ice cream sundae with peanut butter and hot fudge topping. Every month I was charged a fee for not maintaining a minimum balance and every month I hated that they took that fee right out of my account. Well that month the fee was $18 and they took my very last dime. In addition to 10 other dimes that I didn’t have. I had to borrow $20 from my sister and pawn my keyboard to pay for gas to get to work. It was the only time I ever borrowed money from any one in my life. I would have managed to get to my next payday had they not taken that “maintenance” fee.
Several years later and no longer a person who lived paycheck to paycheck, I opened an account with USAA. I opened it with $25. Just as a test, really. It is a huge hassle to change bank accounts and I didn’t want to make a decision I was going to regret later. Well it was the best decision I ever made. This was a bank that worked with me before I got on my financial feet and you better believe I developed a rockin relationship with them after I got there. From one checking account with $25 in it to nine different accounts from Checking and Savings to IRAs (ROTH and Traditional), to both of my houses and so on.
So to the big banks that are now trying to ‘make nice’ I say this: I am reminded of a line uttered by Julia Robert’s character in Pretty Woman: “Big mistake. Huge.”
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
The Rest of My Life
I am engaged. A week an a half into my engagement and I am finally posting about it. It isn't that I didn't think about posting about it, but to be honest, we have just been flying on a cloud since he asked (and I said yes) that it just slipped past my usually diligent fingers. Well, that and working my tail off this week which included one 26 (yes that would be TWENTY-SIX) hour day. I suppose technically that is TWO days but hey, semantics. When no sleep is involved the days blend together.
In the past week and a half it seems like my thoughts are all about having a wedding. This is something that I never anticipated in my life. I had never even looked at wedding dresses before. And did you know they have entire magazines dedicated to nothing but brides and weddings?? So I have been trolling the Internet looking at wedding dresses, bought two magazines and was given one magazine by a wonderful coworker. I have discovered a couple of things in this wedding dress process. First of all, I have pretty consistent taste in designers (Casablanca, Alfred Angelo, Demitrios) and second, wedding gown sizes are enough to drive an otherwise sane woman to homicide. The saving grace to the second is that larger size than I have ever worn aside, a Casablanca gown looks magnificent on me. And looking at wedding dresses...holy canoli it's a LOT of fun!
I am really looking forward to having my crew here with me when I try on the final 5 contenders.
Even MORE than that I am so looking forward to spending the rest of my life with the man of my dreams.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Vegas
I admit that what I am about to say may not go over very well with most people. I have a business trip coming up this week to Las Vegas and I am just not looking forward to it. I know. Who in their right mind would NOT be looking forward to a business trip to Vegas?? Well, I have to say, when you're me, you'd understand.
You see, I am not a drinker (not in an on-the-wagon, in recovery sort of way, just don't enjoy alcohol), I am not into gambling, and while I enjoy good food, it is pretty much wasted on someone who only eats enough to feed a bird. If Eric were with me, at least he could finish what I don't.
I suppose I could go to a show or two. I do enjoy shows. But again, while I am completely comfortable doing things by myself, it would be much more enjoyable if, when spending that kind of money for high quality entertainment, that I was with Eric or ANYONE who I actually know and/or love.
Eric was supposed to join me on this trip. Spend time doing whatever he likes to do (since he went to high school there and still has some connections in the area) during the day and join me in the evenings when I was done doing the obligatory business-y things but work got in the way (curse that mortgage that must be paid!).
I am not one to be totally negative, though. There is, after all, one really good thing about Vegas...the SPA!!!! I guess I will just have to suffer though some really good massages while I am there. Oh...and I think there is a Tiffany's too. Perhaps I can peruse the shelves of that little treasure chest...
And just like that, I am looking forward to the trip again. Woot!
You see, I am not a drinker (not in an on-the-wagon, in recovery sort of way, just don't enjoy alcohol), I am not into gambling, and while I enjoy good food, it is pretty much wasted on someone who only eats enough to feed a bird. If Eric were with me, at least he could finish what I don't.
I suppose I could go to a show or two. I do enjoy shows. But again, while I am completely comfortable doing things by myself, it would be much more enjoyable if, when spending that kind of money for high quality entertainment, that I was with Eric or ANYONE who I actually know and/or love.
Eric was supposed to join me on this trip. Spend time doing whatever he likes to do (since he went to high school there and still has some connections in the area) during the day and join me in the evenings when I was done doing the obligatory business-y things but work got in the way (curse that mortgage that must be paid!).
I am not one to be totally negative, though. There is, after all, one really good thing about Vegas...the SPA!!!! I guess I will just have to suffer though some really good massages while I am there. Oh...and I think there is a Tiffany's too. Perhaps I can peruse the shelves of that little treasure chest...
And just like that, I am looking forward to the trip again. Woot!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Happiness is a warm puppy...
Ok, so the title of this post is a blatant thievery from a Peanuts cartoon. So what? It sums up my evening perfectly. Now I realize that my puppy, Miss Macy Moo is HARDLY a puppy. She is an 88 pound 9 year old Greater Swiss Mountain/Rott mix. But we have a connection, her and I. We have a routine. We sit home in the evenings, I brew some tea, pop some popcorn and her and I watch some A&E or Discovery channel. We share the popcorn, she shares my lap and I believe the both of us are about as content as we can be. Happiness really is a warm puppy to share an evening with.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Unhappy
It is a rare thing to find a person who does what they love for a living. Or is it? How many people do you know who can honestly say that they love going to work every day? I happen to know quite a few people who absolutely love what they do. Totally jealous, by the way.
Then there are those like me who love getting paid, but loathe their job. I suppose I have no one to blame but myself. You can't do a job you didn't apply for, right? Now I know the economy is in the dirt, blah blah blah. This is not about the economy (Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, people.) This is about the feeling of dread that comes each Sunday. That feeling that if work was supposed to be enjoyable, they would call it a hobby and charge you to do it. That feeling that you try day after day to fight through to find the positive: "I work with great people". "The money more than pays the bills". "I am grateful to have a job at all". All of which apply to me. And none of which make the WORK any better. This hasn't always been the case during my years in the military. Just this particular job.
Perhaps someday there will be a job out there for a sushi taster or a chocolate eater or a racquetball learner that I could apply for. But until that time, I suppose I will just have to keep going and do the best job I know how while fighting the unhappy Sundays that always seem to keep coming.
At least there is happiness in knowing that when I retire from the military in 9 years, 10 months and 8 days from now, Eric and I will buy our own franchise and we will never have to work FOR anyone again.
Then there are those like me who love getting paid, but loathe their job. I suppose I have no one to blame but myself. You can't do a job you didn't apply for, right? Now I know the economy is in the dirt, blah blah blah. This is not about the economy (Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, people.) This is about the feeling of dread that comes each Sunday. That feeling that if work was supposed to be enjoyable, they would call it a hobby and charge you to do it. That feeling that you try day after day to fight through to find the positive: "I work with great people". "The money more than pays the bills". "I am grateful to have a job at all". All of which apply to me. And none of which make the WORK any better. This hasn't always been the case during my years in the military. Just this particular job.
Perhaps someday there will be a job out there for a sushi taster or a chocolate eater or a racquetball learner that I could apply for. But until that time, I suppose I will just have to keep going and do the best job I know how while fighting the unhappy Sundays that always seem to keep coming.
At least there is happiness in knowing that when I retire from the military in 9 years, 10 months and 8 days from now, Eric and I will buy our own franchise and we will never have to work FOR anyone again.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Thoughts from the last decade...
There were many things about this last decade that stick out in our minds. The obvious one being 9/11. While I remember all the same things that the rest of you do, (where I was, what I was doing, etc.), the thought that sticks with me the most with regard to 9/11 is the fact that I am of the age where I do not remember a time when the World Trade Center towers weren't there (I was born in 1971 and the towers were completed in 1972), but the kids born that day and after will never know a time when the towers WERE there. The top of tower 2 was my favorite place on the planet and will not likely be replaced any time soon.
On the other side of 9/11 though was a momentous occasion, and that was the turn of the old century into the new. Not too many people get to experience a turn of centuries. I spent my New Year's Eve, 1999, at a garden party at the house of a friend of a friend who's name I can't even remember, on the intercoastal of Miami complete with ice sculptures, sushi boats and Saigon Kick (had a hit song or two in the 80's to include the rock ballad "Love Is On The Way"). I shared the stage with them for a song. One of life's cooler moments to be sure. It was also the decade when I bought my first house (4 more would follow), graduated from college (which I never thought I would ever do in a million years), got to wear the title of Assistant Vice President while at Bank Of America, started and dropped out of Law School, came back into the military, and adopted my first dog who, to this day, brings a joy into my life I never imagined possible.
It was also the decade I turned 30, which I thought was the coolest age ever. On the down side, it is the decade when I became obsessed with my weight, which is a side of me that I loathe. It is also the decade when I lost my uncle, who I loved dearly, and my father who meant more to me than just about anyone on the planet. Back to the upside, it was a decade where I became even more self-aware than I was before and truly became comfortable with who I was as a person. I am proud as hell of who I have become and the life that I have created for myself. While I am fairly good at being reflective, I am still guilty of that-which-is-forefront-in-my-life-takes-the-spotlight, so with that in mind, the greatest occurrence of the past decade didn't take place until it was almost over. I fell in love. Eric, this next decade is for you...
On the other side of 9/11 though was a momentous occasion, and that was the turn of the old century into the new. Not too many people get to experience a turn of centuries. I spent my New Year's Eve, 1999, at a garden party at the house of a friend of a friend who's name I can't even remember, on the intercoastal of Miami complete with ice sculptures, sushi boats and Saigon Kick (had a hit song or two in the 80's to include the rock ballad "Love Is On The Way"). I shared the stage with them for a song. One of life's cooler moments to be sure. It was also the decade when I bought my first house (4 more would follow), graduated from college (which I never thought I would ever do in a million years), got to wear the title of Assistant Vice President while at Bank Of America, started and dropped out of Law School, came back into the military, and adopted my first dog who, to this day, brings a joy into my life I never imagined possible.
It was also the decade I turned 30, which I thought was the coolest age ever. On the down side, it is the decade when I became obsessed with my weight, which is a side of me that I loathe. It is also the decade when I lost my uncle, who I loved dearly, and my father who meant more to me than just about anyone on the planet. Back to the upside, it was a decade where I became even more self-aware than I was before and truly became comfortable with who I was as a person. I am proud as hell of who I have become and the life that I have created for myself. While I am fairly good at being reflective, I am still guilty of that-which-is-forefront-in-my-life-takes-the-spotlight, so with that in mind, the greatest occurrence of the past decade didn't take place until it was almost over. I fell in love. Eric, this next decade is for you...
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